topics

on my way to hospital this morning, i thought of a topic i could write in this blog. actually i thought more than a topic. i even had some concrete ideas about what i really wanted to say and how to say them and i even thought of some phrases in english. i remember wowing to myself that it would be a good writing and wondering how the idea came out of nowhere all of a sudden. now i have time and i am trying to recall what idea it was that came to me this morning on my way to hospital. the idea hasn't come forward and refused to materialize. i am utterly at a loss. when the idea grabbed me, i couldn't help but think about it and follow the idea all the way down the road. i know it might be dangerous to get preoccupied with a topic while pedalling a bike in street. now the idea has become illusive. i can recall how excited i was when i was hit by the idea. but i can't recall the idea itself. ideas are illusive. they come and go and i have no idea where they come from and where they go. they are like travelers. they materialize and i become aware of their fleeting presences. sometimes i am not aware of their outlines. in some cases i know i have some vague ideas but i just can't grasp any. well, since i can't make the idea concrete, i am writing about its illusiveness. this experience tells me that i need to jot down some good ideas now and then before they vanish without a trace.