【Annie读诗】《园丁集》41 我想对你说…… 泰戈尔（印度）

《园丁集》41 泰戈尔 我想对你说出……

冰心（译）

我想对你说出我要说的最深的话语，我不敢，我怕你哂笑。 因此我嘲笑自己，把我的秘密在玩笑中打碎。 我把我的痛苦说得轻松，因为怕你会这样做。

我想对你说出最真的话语，我不敢，我怕你不信。 因此我弄真成假，说出和我的真心相反的话。 我把我的痛苦说得可笑，因为我怕你会这样做。

我想用最宝贵的名词来形容你， 我不敢，我怕得不到相当的酬报。 因此我给你安上苛刻的名字，以夸示我的硬骨。 我伤害你，因为怕你永远不知道我的痛苦。

我渴望静默的坐在你的身旁，我不敢，怕我的心会跳到我的唇上。 因此我轻松的说东道西，把我的心藏在语言的后面。 我粗暴的对待我的痛苦，因为我怕你会这样做。

我渴望从你身边走开，我不敢，怕你看出我的懦怯。 因此我随随便便的昂着走到你的面前。 从你眼里频频掷来的刺激，使我的痛苦永远新鲜。

I long to speak the deepest words I have to say to you ; but I dare not, for fear you should laugh. That is why I laugh at myself and shatter my secret in jest. I make light of my pain, afraid you should do so.

I long to tell you the truest words I have to say to you; but I dare not,being afraid that you would not believe them. That is why I disguise them in untruth, saying the contrary of what I mean. I make my pain appear absurd, afraid that you should do so.

I long to use the most precious words I have for you; but I dare not, fearing I should not be paid with like value. That is why I gave you hard names and boast of my boast of my callous strength. I hurt you, for fear you should never know any pain.

I long to sit silent by you; but I dare not lest my heart come out at my lips. That is why I prattle and chatter lightly and hide my heart behind words. I rudely handle my pain, for fear you should do so.

I long to go away from your side; but I dare not, for fear my cowardice should become known to you. That is why I hold my head high and carelessly come into your presence. Constant thrusts from your eyes keep my pain fresh for ever.

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