Sun Kil Moon 《Benji》全碟歌词
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http://www.xiami.com/album/990188384
1. Carissa
Oh Carissa, when I first saw you, you were a lovely child.
And the last time I saw you, you were fifteen and pregnant and running wild.
I remember wondering, could there be a light at the end of your tunnel?
But I left Ohio then and pretty much forgotten all about you.
I guess you were there some years ago at a family funeral.
But you were one of so many relatives I didn't know which one was you.
Yesterday morning I woke up to so many, 330 area code calls.
I called my mom back and she was in tears and asked how to spoke to my father.
Carissa burned to death last night in a freak accident fire.
In her yard in Bruster her daughter came home from a party and found her.
Same way as my uncle who was her grandfather.
An aerosol can blew up in the trash, goddamn, what were the odds?
She was just getting ready to go to her midnight shift as an RN is Rosworth.
And she vanished up in flames like that but there had to be more to her life's worth.
Everyone's grieving out of their minds, making arrangements and taking drugs.
But I'm flying out there tomorrow because I need to give and get some hugs.
Cause I got questions that I'd like to get answered.
I may never get them, but Carissa gotta know how did it happen.
Carissa was thirty-five, you don't just raise two kids and take out your trash and die.
She was my second cousin, I didn't know her well at all but it doesn't mean that I wasn't meant to find some poetry to make some sense of this, to find a deeper meaning.
In a senseless tragedy, oh Carissa I'll sing your name across every sea.
Were you doing someone else's chores for them?
Were you just killing time, finding things to do all by your lonesome?
Was it even you mistakenly put flammables in the trash.
Was it your kids just being kids, and so, oh, the guilt they will carry around forever.
Well I'm going out there to get a look at the landscapes, to get a look at those I'm connected by blood and see how it all may have shaped me.
Well I'm going out there though I'm not really needed.
I'm just so broken up about it, how is it that this sad history repeated?
I'll return to Ohio, to the place I was born.
Gonna see where I hung with my cousins and played with them in the snow.
Fist in their palms, gonna see how they've grown.
Visit some greats and say hey I've missed you.
Gonna find out as much as I can about my second little cousin Carissa.
Gonna go to Ohio, where I was born. Got a 10:45 am flight, I'm leaving tomorrow morning.
Gonna see my aunts and my uncles, my parents and sisters.
Mostly I'm going to pay my respects to my little second cousin Carissa.
Going to Ohio where I feel I belong.
Ask those who know the most about Carissa for it her life and death that I'm helplessly drawn.
Carissa was thirty-five, raised kids since she was fifteen years old and suddenly died.
Next to an old river, fire pit, oh there's gotta be more than that to it.
She was only my second cousin but it don't mean that I'm not here for her or that I wasn't meant to give her life poetry, make sure her name is known across every city.
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2. I Can't Live Without My Mother's Love
I can live with the sky falling out from above
I can live with your scorn, your sourness, your smug
I can live growing old alone if push comes to shove
But I can't live without my mother's love
I can live flying round at an impossible pace
I can live with the bad etiquette that's falling on this place
I can live with anything you've got to throw in my face
But I can't live without my mother's embrace
My mother is seventy five
She's the closest friend I have in my life
Take her from me, I'll break down and bawl
And wither away like old leaves in the fall
You can be cruel all you want, talk bad on my brothers
Shoot me full of holes and I won't by bothered
Judge me for my ways and my slew of ex-lovers
But don't ever dare say a bad word about my mother
When she's gone I'll miss how slowly she walks
Playing scrabble with the chimes of the grandfather clock
I'll even miss the times that we fought
But mostly I'll miss being able to call her and talk.
I can live without watching the classic old fights
I can live without a lover beside me at night
I can live without what you might call a charmed life
But I can't live without my mother providing her light
My mother is seventy five
One day she won't be here to hear me cry
When the day comes for her to let go
I'll die off like a lemon tree in the snow
When the day comes for her to leave
I won't have the courage to sort through her things
With my sisters and all our memories
I cannot bear all the pain it will bring
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3.Truck Driver
My uncle died in a fire on his birthday.
Redneck that he was, burning trash in the yard one day.
On the pile he threw an aerosol can of spray.
And that's how he died in the fire that day.
Before he retired he was a truck driver.
He'd be gone through the winters and all through the summers.
In the winters us kids would order Dominoes and watch Happy Days.
And in the summer we get frogs at the pond and fry up their legs.
My aunt still lives there out in Ohio.
I visit her and the autumn air, she makes me smile.
We remember the story of when I was young.
Getting stung by a hornet, she caressed my foot, rubbed bacon and powder on it.
I was probably five at their home in Nevarn.
My cousin's friend was in the yard playing guitar.
We all gathered round, listened to her play and sing.
And I fell into a trance and knew that one day I'd do the same thing.
My uncle died in a fire on his birthday.
Out by the barn in his old collection of cars.
Third degree burns, a charred up shovel near his hand.
My uncle died a respected man.
I flew out there, I went to his funeral.
It was stormy that day, the sky was deep purple.
And babies were crying, Kentucky Fried Chicken was served.
And that's how he would have wanted it I'm sure.
And after the funeral out there in Nevarn, they all gathered round when I picked up a guitar.
They fell into a trance as I sang and I played.
And outside the frost grew and the mantises prayed and prayed.
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4.Dogs
Katy Kerlan was my first kiss.
I was only five years as she hit me with her purse.
I had braces on my legs and I always fell down.
And from that day moving forward I've been petrified of blondes.
Oh Patricia, she was my first love.
She said I hate what's behind me and I couldn't breathe.
I gave her Pink Floyd - Animals when we were in sixth grade.
And it was on her turntable when I met her on Sunday.
Her mom was gone, we were listening to Dogs.
She reached down my pants and discovered I was bald.
And when I touched her down there she was blossoming and soft.
And the next day at school she ignored me in the hall.
Shelly and Amber gave me my first taste.
I went down on them both at Amber's parents' place.
We were drunk as skunks and high on darvon.
And they gave me a bath and I stumbled on home.
Mary Anne was my first fuck.
She slide down between my legs and oh my god she could suck.
I went with her friend first but I couldn't get it in.
And when she caught me with Mary Anne her heart was broken.
Mary Anne got cold and abruptly broke it off for a guy with sweatpants and a pick-up truck.
I begged her not to dump me and I pleaded no.
But her body language told me it was time for me to go.
The guy with the truck picked me up and brought me home.
I sat down at my piano and my spirit was low.
But I pulled myself together and I played a few notes.
Now I was the one who got their heart broke.
I met a girl named Debra, she lived on a canal.
She made me eggs in the morning, she was such a sweet gal.
And we went to Red Lobster and we went to Tangir's.
She had motherly love, she was woman, she cared.
She was a beautiful girl and she had a big heart,
but I drifted away because there wasn't that spark.
Oh the complicated mess of sex and love.
When you give that first stinger you're the one who gets stung.
And when you lose control and how good it feels to cum.
You ain't a pimp like a dog getting into someone.
Oh rejection how it hurts so much,
when you can't love the one you've been longing to touch.
And there's always something else and it don't feel right.
And you wonder if they're coming together all night.
Get your own trash, the cycle's on and on.
And nobody's right and nobody's wrong.
All her shakes sometimes we were drawn.
It's a complicated place, this planet we're on.
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5.Pray for Newtown
I was a Junior in high school when I turned the TV on.
James Huberty went to a restaurant, shot everyone up with a machine gun.
It was from my hometown.
We talked about it til the sun went down.
Then everybody got up and stretched and yawned and then our lives went on.
And I just left Safeway, when I walked through my doorway.
When a guy took a bullet to an island and shot up a bunch of little kids up in Norway.
Called a few of my friends round here, but no one much really cared.
But I did, because I've got a lot of friends there.
I just arrived in Seoul, by way of Beijing.
I had an hour to myself in my hotel when I turned on the TV.
It was quite a thriller, CNN was recording the bat man killer.
His eyes were glazed like he was from Mars.
Yesterday he was no one, today he was a star.
I was down in New Orleans, at the model o.
Enjoying some time all to myself when I turned the TV on.
There were shootings in a Portland mall.
It was everyday America and that's all.
It was just another one walked down Royal Street, the rest of the world was out having fun.
December fourteenth, another killing went down.
I got a letter from a fan he said Mark say a prayer for Newtown.
I ain't one to pray, but I'm one to sing and play for women and children and moms and dads and brothers and sisters and uncles and aunts.
December twenty-fifth, and I was just laying down.
I picked up a pen, I wrote a letter to the guy in Newtown.
I said I'm sorry bout the killings, and the teachers who lost their lives.
I felt it coming on, I felt it in my bones and I don't know why.
So when Christmas comes and you're out running around.
Take a moment to pause and think of the kids that died in Newtown.
They went so young, who gave their lives.
To make us stop and think and try to get it right.
Were so young, a cloud so dark over them.
And they left home, gave their mom and dad a kiss and a hug.
So when your birthday comes and you're feeling pretty good,
bake a cake for an orphan and stuff your mouth with food.
Check it off for the children who lost their lives.
Think of their families and how they mourn and cry.
When you're gonna get married and you're out shopping around,
take a moment to think about the families that lost so much in Newtown.
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6.Jim Wise
Spent the day with my dad and his old friend, Jim Wise.
He's on house arrest and he sits around inside.
We brought him food from Panera Bread, the snoring sun rolled out of bed.
He talked about his ninety Corvette, his warehouse job, and his knee replacement.
Jim Wise mercy killed his wife in a hospital at her bedside.
And he put the gun to his head and it jammed and he didn't die.
He went to trial all summer long and his eyes welled up when he told us
about how much she loved the backyard garden and the budding rosebush.
She loved the garden, and its budding rosebush.
Spent the day with my dad, and his friend Jim Wise.
Spent the day with my dad and his old friend, Jim Wise.
He's got a big thick ankle bracelet and he can't go outside.
He's got a long white Amish man's beard and a catheter.
And he'll be headed to Mansfield prison by the end of the year for sure.
His shelves are sticky old ratty boards.
His albums are The Doors and Stevie Nicks.
His kitchen cabinets are full of baked beans.
His TV is sound, words flash across the screen and he stares off into dead air.
Jim Wise killed his wife out of love for her at her bedside.
And then he put the gun to his head but he failed at suicide.
His trial's coming up in the fall and he sighed when we stepped out and we left.
And I pointed out the pretty cardinal perched on the empty birdbath.
The bright red cardinal, the empty birdbath.
Spent today with my dad and his friend Jim Wise.
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7.I Love My Dad
When I was young my father taught me not to gloat.
If I came home too proud of myself I get wrestled to the floor and choked.
But I forgive him for that.
He was an eighth grade drop out and I was being a brat.
I forgive him, I do.
I know that he loves me and he knows I love him too.
When I was young my father told me, to each his own.
The lady said as she kissed the cow,some like the fiddle, some like the trombone and I live by that rule.
Your trip is your trip and my trip is my trip too.
Yeah, I'll mind my own business.
Oh, having no rules in my friend here have.
I love my dad. (x4)
Your kid goes to the private Berkley school with one black kid.
My kid goes to the public school, came home with cracked ribs.
And when my kid's eighteen he'll be out there like I was and probably chasing his dreams.
And when your kid's twenty-two, he'll have an internship at a law firm and hey that's okay too.
When I was five I came home from kindergarten crying cause they sat me next to an albino.
My dad said son everyone's different, you gotta love em all equally.
And then my dad sat me down, he said you gotta love all people, pink, red, black, or brown.
And then just after dinner he played me the album They Only Come Out At Night by Edgar Winter.
When I was young my dad taught me the beauty of patience.
We'd go and hang with his friend Billy Brislin all day in his Stubenville basement.
We'd watch wrestling matches on TV and Billy couldn't move cause he was handicapped.
And I learned to shoot the shit, and how to care for those in need and to show respect.
When I was a kid my dad brought home a guitar he got from Sears.
I took lessons from a neighbor lady but it wasn't going anywhere.
He went and got me a good teacher and in no time at all I was getting better.
I can play just fine. I still practice a lot but not as much as Mills Climb.
When I was young my dad told me to pay gossip no mind.
When people talk bad on you you gotta flick it off your shoulder like a fly.
Learn to pick your punches, don't get no tussles, dead in ditches.
Life is short young man, get out there and make the best of it while you can.
I ain't trying to say my dad was some kind of a perfect saint.
When something set him off, I hit the floor quicker than what Mike Tyson did to Ricky Sveen.
I hit the floor so fast, but that was so long ago and we both moved past.
My life is pretty good, I owe it to him.
My dad did the best he could.
I love you dad. (x4)
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8.I Watched the Film the Song Remains the Same
I watched the film 'The Song Remains the Same'
At the midnight movies when I was a kid
At a Canton, Ohio mall with friends
One warm summer weekend
Jimmy Page stood tall on screen
I was mesmerized by everything
The Peter Grant and John Paul Jones dream sequence scenes
The close-up of the mahogany double-necked SG
And though I loved the sound of the roaring Les Paul
What spoke to me most was 'Rain Song' and 'Bron-Yr-Aur'
And I loved the thunder of Jon Bonham's drums
But even more I like 'No Quarter's low Fender Rhodes hum
I don't know what happened or what anyone did
From my earliest memories I was a very melancholic kid
When anything close to me at all in the world died
To my heart, forever, it would be tied
Like when my friend was thrown from his moped
When some kind of a big truck back-ended him
And when the girl who sat in front of me in remedial
Was killed in an accident one weekend and quickly forgotten about at school
And when we got the call that my grandmother passed
The nervous tension I'd been feeling for months broke
And strangely I laughed
Then I went to my bedroom and I laid down
And in my tears and in the heaviness of everything I drowned
Though I kept to myself and for the most part was pretty coy
I once got baited and had to clock some undeserving boy
Out on the elementary school playground
I threw a punch that caught him off-guard and knocked him down
And when I walked away the kids were cheering
And though I grinned deep inside, I was hurting
But not nearly as much as I hurt him
He stood up, his glasses broken and his face was red
And I was never a schoolyard bully
It was only one incident
And it has always eaten at me
I was never the young schoolyard bully
And wherever you are, that poor kid, I'm so sorry
And when I grew older I learned to play guitar
While everyone else was throwing around a football
Wearing bright colors the school issued them
Parroting passed down phrases and cheer leading
I got a recording contract in 1992
From there my name, my band and my audience grew
And since that time so much has happened to me
But I discovered I cannot shake melancholy
For 46 years now I cannot break the spell
I'll carry it through my life and probably carry it down
I'll go to my grave with my melancholy
And my ghost will echo my sentiments for all eternity
And now when I watch 'The Song Remains the Same'
The same things speak to me that spoke to me then
Except that now the scenes with Peter Grant and Jon Bonham
Are different when I think of the deaths that fell upon them
I got a friend who lives in the desert outside Santa Fe
I'm going to visit him this Saturday
Between my travels and his divorce and our time not being what it was
It's been 15 years since I last saw him
He's the man who signed me back in '92
And I'm going to go there and tell him face-to-face, 'thank you'
For discovering my talent so early
For helping me along in this beautiful musical world I was meant to be in
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9.Richard Ramirez Died Today of Natural Causes
Richard Ramirez died today of natural causes
Got amped up on speed and broke into houses
Bunch of people of that wrote shit on the stand
His last murder was south of San Francisco
A guy named Peter Pan from the town
The little girl on the lawn was his first
And the took a dark palmer
His last days were at a hotel
a nice stalker
Door member we set just like the mars
In a key and a dark..
Cried today from Boston to'
Got a dozen families gotta do some digging
Boston relative and they see me all
Make a little long
I need a little more
Richard Ramirez died today of natural causes
These thing mark time and they cause pauses
Think about the kids scared to death on the window
What's under the bed and what's under the door
And the John's massacre got in our heads
And the TV, I was president
And the around Oregon
While I'm there I'm gonna stroll through the old neighborhood
Rich Stan Mayer still lives with his mom
When he's not in jail from innocent stalking
Writing bad checks and cocaine charges
More than that took you with a smile
We always sat on this porch passing the time
And drinking a beer and smoking a pack
Till one day poor ma caught a heart attack
The good jobs electrician
Sister of Mary the poor shark Jean Avery
My next door neighbors whom I love so
Love me too but they passed long ago
And if you walk just a few lock down stall
There's a house as scary as all
A cute little palm with a sign for sale
Those Sexton kids hot as hell
And I'm telling the truth and if you don't believe
Pick up the cofield stars and secrets
Had to fly from Cleveland but what's that for?
Got 3 months off to my next show
Gonna spend time with my girl
Make a record fix my kitchen
I have my change so rapidly
They came to the studio to work on some grit
And I saw the news on James
While I was eating Ramen and drinking green tea
The supreme guy died at 51
That's the same age as the guy
Who's coming to play drums
So don't lie your kids no disturb
Have to repeat 50 times a day is bad enough
Got a naked prostate and I got a bad back
When I fall too much
I feel like I'm gonna have a heart attack
This all the head blinds and they're like crashing
And I met her at a barbeque
Santa Philly
And everybody's drunk and feeling pretty well
Richard Ramirez died but in 83
He was very much alive he's as scary as could be
And in the band he had pentagrams
And everybody remember the paranoia
When he stocked us up in Southern California
And everybody will remember where they were
When they finally found the stalker
And I remember just where I was
When Richard Ramirez died of natural cause
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10.Micheline
Micheline used to come to our house and knock on our door.
My dad would answer and say, "What do you want girl?"
and she'd say, "Can I take a bath with Mark?"
My dad would say, "My son ain't here,"
send her home and shut the door and we'd all laugh.
And Micheline would walk down the street
glowing and smiling like she just got Paul McCartney's autograph.
Her brain worked a little slower than the others; she wore thick-rimmed glasses.
She took a different bus to school than other kids and was in different kid of classes.
When she got older a neighborhood thug moved in with her
and started taking her welfare payments.
He took her down to the bank,
helped her withdraw her savings that was put away for her and he went off with it.
The cops caught up with him, he did a little time and cut too many years later.
He's doing life in a Florida penitentiary with his father, both of them for murder.
Micheline, Micheline. Micheline, Micheline. Micheline, Micheline, Micheline.
She wanted love like anyone else.
Micheline, Micheline, Micheline,
She had dreams like anyone else.
My friend Brett, my friend Brett, my friend Brett, my friend Brett, he liked to play the guitar.
But he had an awkward way of playing barre chords
with two fingers spreading his index and middle fingers really far apart.
One day in band practice he dropped like a deer was shot and was flipping around like a fish.
He had an aneurysm triggered by a nerve in his hand from the strain he was putting on it.
I went to see him in Ohio; he had a horseshoe shaped scar on his scalp and he talked real slow.
We played pool like we did in our teens and his head was shaved and he still wore bell-bottomed jeans.
In '99 I was on tour in Sweden when I called home
To tell my mom that I got a part in a movie
when she said "Mark, there's something that you need to know."
"Brett died the other day, you really should send a letter to his mom and dad."
And I got on my train in Malmo
and looked out at the snow feeling somewhere between happy and sad.
My friend Brett, my friend Brett. My friend Brett, my friend Brett.
My friend Brett, my friend Brett, my friend Brett.
He had a wife and a son.
My friend Brett, my friend Brett, my friend Brett.
He just liked to play guitar and he never hurt anyone.
My grandma, my grandma, my grandma, my grandma, my grandma, my grandma.
Before she passed away we'd go and visit her at my aunt's house when I was small.
I couldn't bear the shape she was in so at the top of the driveway I'd sit in the car.
One day I was just fucking around when I put it in reverse and I was free-falling.
I remember the car moving backwards; my heart was beating and I blacked out.
Another car was coming down the street and I totaled them both and I got knocked out.
My grandma, my grandma, my grandma, my grandma, my grandma, my grandma.
First time I met her, she lived in L.A.; I think it was Huntington Park.
I made friends with a kid named Marceau and another kid named Cyrus Hunt.
We'd go downtown and get ice cream and feed french fries to the pigeons
and talk to the handicapped vets from Vietnam.
It was the first time I saw a hummingbird, a palm tree, or a lizard.
Or saw an ocean, or heard David Bowie's "Young Americans"
and I saw the movie "Benji" in theaters.
My grandma, my grandma. My grandma, my grandma.
My grandma, my grandma, my grandma.
I heard she had a pretty hard life.
But after her first husband passed away
she met a man from California and he treated her really nice.
My grandma, my grandma. My grandma, my grandma.
My grandma, my grandma, my grandma.
My grandma was diagnosed at 62.
Her kids stepped up to the plate for her and were there the whole way through.
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11.Ben's My Friend
I woke up this morning, August 3rd
It's been a pretty slow and uneventful summer
Went to visit a friend in Santa Fe
Went to New Orleans and went to see my family
Woke up this morning and it occurred
I needed one more track to finish up my record
I was feeling out of fuel and uninspired
Laid on my bed, too hung, a little down, a little tired
Met my girl and we walked down Union Street
I was scared and my head was in a bunch of places
Bought a 350 dollar pair of lampshades
And we ate at Perry's and I ordered crab cakes
Blue crab cakes
Blue crab cakes
Blue crab cakes
She said I seemed distracted and asked what was going on with me
I said I can't explain it and it's a middle age thing
She said okay and ate her eggs Benedict
And I looked at the walls cluttered with sports bar shit
Sports bar shit
Sports bar shit
Sports bar shit
Got on the phone and I called my mother
And called my father, talked a little bit with my sister
She's got a new boyfriend, he's a deer hunter
And she's getting used to venison
And my dad's still fighting with his girlfriend
About his flirting with the girls in Panera Bread
My mom is good but sounded out of breath
I worry so much about her, I worry to death
I worry to death
I worry about her to death
I worry to death
The other night I went and saw The Postal Service
Ben's my friend but getting there was the worst
Trying to park and getting up the hill
And find a spot amongst the drunk kids staring at their cells
Standing at the back with the crowd of eight thousand
I thought of Ben when I met him in 2000
At a festival in Spain
He was on the small stage then and I didn't know his name
Now he's singing at the Greek and he's busting moves
And my legs were hurting and my feet were too
I called him after, said I'll skip the backstage high five
But thanks for the nice music and all the exercise
And we laughed and it was alright
And we laughed and it was alright
And it was alright
There's a fine line between a middle-aged guy with a backstage pass
And a guy with a gut hanging around like a jackass
Everybody there was twenty years younger than me
At least that this is not my fondest memory
I carried my legs back down and then I gave
My backstage passes to two cute asian girls
I drove to my place near Tahoe
Got in my hot tub and thought well that's how it goes
And it was quiet and I was listening to the crickets
And Ben's still out there, selling lots of tickets
And though while we pretend that there's a temperature competitiveness
But Ben's my friend and I know he gets it
Then in a couple of days my meltdown passed
Back to the studio doing twelve hours shifts
Singing a song about one thing or another
Another day behind the microphone this summer
This tenderloin summer
This tenderloin summer
This tenderloin summer
