Disgrace: 10(16)
He has stayed with his daughter only for brief periods before. Now he is sharing her house, her life. He has to be careful not to allow old habits to creep back, the habits of a parent: putting the toilet roll on the spool, switching off lights, chasing the cat off the sofa. Practise for old age, he admonishes himself. Practise fitting in. Practise for the old folks' home.
以前他在女儿这里只做过短时期的逗留。如今他分享着她的房子，走进了她的生活。他得小心，不要带出那些老习性，家长习性：把卷筒卫生纸放到卷轴上啊，关灯啊，把猫从沙发上赶开啊。学着过老年人的生活吧，他告诫自己。学着融洽相处。学习过老年公寓里的生活。
He pretends he is tired and, after supper, withdraws to his room, where faintly the sounds come to him of Lucy leading her own life: drawers opening and shutting, the radio, the murmur of a telephone conversation. Is she calling Johannesburg, speaking to Helen? Is his presence here keeping the two of them apart? Would they dare to share a bed while he was in the house? If the bed creaked in the night, would they be embarrassed? Embarrassed enough to stop? But what does he know about what women do together? Maybe women do not need to make beds creak. And what does he know about these two in particular, Lucy and Helen? Perhaps they sleep together merely as children do, cuddling, touching, giggling, reliving girlhood - sisters more than lovers. Sharing a bed, sharing a bathtub, baking gingerbread cookies, trying on each other's clothes. Sapphic love: an excuse for putting on weight.
他假装累了，吃完晚饭便进了自己的房间。露西个人生活里的声音隐隐约约地传进房间里来：抽屉拉开和关上的声音，收音机的声音，电话交谈的低语声。她是打到约翰内斯堡和海伦说话么？他在这里逗留是不是阻碍了她们俩的会合？他在这里住的期间她们敢不敢睡一张床呢？如果夜里床嘎吱作响，她们会感到尴尬么？尴尬到停下来？不过关于女人之间做的事他又知道什么呢？也许女人的做法并不需要让床嘎吱作响吧。而且特定地，就露西和海伦而言，他又知道什么呢？或许她们睡在一起只不过就像孩子们那样，拥抱，触摸，咯咯笑，重新经历少女时代——比起情人，更像是姐妹。共用一张床，共用一个澡盆，烤姜饼娃娃，试穿彼此的衣服。女性间的同性恋：为心安理得增加体重而找的借口吧。
Read Alps 2014年7月22日
以前他在女儿这里只做过短时期的逗留。如今他分享着她的房子，走进了她的生活。他得小心，不要带出那些老习性，家长习性：把卷筒卫生纸放到卷轴上啊，关灯啊，把猫从沙发上赶开啊。学着过老年人的生活吧，他告诫自己。学着融洽相处。学习过老年公寓里的生活。
He pretends he is tired and, after supper, withdraws to his room, where faintly the sounds come to him of Lucy leading her own life: drawers opening and shutting, the radio, the murmur of a telephone conversation. Is she calling Johannesburg, speaking to Helen? Is his presence here keeping the two of them apart? Would they dare to share a bed while he was in the house? If the bed creaked in the night, would they be embarrassed? Embarrassed enough to stop? But what does he know about what women do together? Maybe women do not need to make beds creak. And what does he know about these two in particular, Lucy and Helen? Perhaps they sleep together merely as children do, cuddling, touching, giggling, reliving girlhood - sisters more than lovers. Sharing a bed, sharing a bathtub, baking gingerbread cookies, trying on each other's clothes. Sapphic love: an excuse for putting on weight.
他假装累了，吃完晚饭便进了自己的房间。露西个人生活里的声音隐隐约约地传进房间里来：抽屉拉开和关上的声音，收音机的声音，电话交谈的低语声。她是打到约翰内斯堡和海伦说话么？他在这里逗留是不是阻碍了她们俩的会合？他在这里住的期间她们敢不敢睡一张床呢？如果夜里床嘎吱作响，她们会感到尴尬么？尴尬到停下来？不过关于女人之间做的事他又知道什么呢？也许女人的做法并不需要让床嘎吱作响吧。而且特定地，就露西和海伦而言，他又知道什么呢？或许她们睡在一起只不过就像孩子们那样，拥抱，触摸，咯咯笑，重新经历少女时代——比起情人，更像是姐妹。共用一张床，共用一个澡盆，烤姜饼娃娃，试穿彼此的衣服。女性间的同性恋：为心安理得增加体重而找的借口吧。
Read Alps 2014年7月22日
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