怎样才能变得自信?

How can I become socially confident?

Stop caring.

停止在意。

I know your parents told you always to think before you talk.

我知道你父母告诉过你说话之前要三思。

They were wrong.

他们错了。

Thinking gives you social anxiety. Often, it leads to pain.

思考会让你产生社交焦虑。通常，它会导致疼痛。

I read one-hundred-and-twenty books in a year. At the end of the year, my life was the same. Why would it change? Knowledge is useful only when applied. I’d spent a year thinking rather than doing.

我一年读了120本书。年底的时候，我的生活还是一样的。为什么会改变?知识只有在应用时才是有用的。我花了一年的时间思考而不是行动。

The next year, I stopped reading. With the extra time, I wrote three hundred blog posts and a book. My income tripled, I received speaking opportunities, and created one of the largest marketing communities in Silicon Valley.

第二年，我停止了阅读。用这些额外的时间，我写了三百篇博客和一本书。我的收入增加了两倍，我得到了演讲的机会，并创建了硅谷最大的营销社区之一。

Being socially confident is about taking action. Because only action can lead to reward.

社交自信就是采取行动。因为只有行动才能带来回报。

When someone makes fun of you or rejects you, don’t think about it. As soon as you start thinking, you stop taking action and feel anxious. So, move forward with every bad situation while keeping a happy-go-lucky attitude and smile.

当有人取笑你或拒绝你时，不要去想它。一旦你开始思考，你就会停止行动，感到焦虑。所以，在面对每一个糟糕的情况时，保持一种乐天派的态度和微笑。

The other day, I flirted with this cute, dark-skinned girl with long, wavy black hair. She rejected me ten times in an hour before she kissed me.

前几天，我和这个长着一头黑色波浪长发的可爱的深肤色女孩调情。她一小时内拒绝了我十次才吻我。

Most guys would’ve given up after the first rejection. No one sticks around for ten.

大多数男人在第一次被拒绝后就放弃了。没有人能坚持10分钟。

I’m sure there were many times when she thought about walking away, but she was intrigued by the simple fact that I didn’t care.

我敢肯定有很多次她想要离开，但她被我不在乎这个简单的事实所吸引。

I brushed off rejection like it never happened by moving the conversation forward with jokes and fun conversation.

我用笑话和有趣的谈话来推进谈话，就像从来没有发生过一样，我对拒绝不予理睬。

For the entire hour, she couldn’t understand why I wasn’t hurting.

整整一个小时，她都不明白为什么我没有受伤。

Eventually, she got it.

最后，她成功了。

“You’re super confident? Aren’t you?”

“你是超级自信的?不是吗?”

“I don’t think about it. I don’t get mad. I’m just here living in the moment.”

“我不去想它，我不生气。我只是活在当下。”

“Not even a little mad?”

“一点也不生气吗?”

“Are you worried about something?”

“你在担心什么吗?”

She looked stunned. I expressed myself as a socially confident person, then indicated her questions revealed her own anxiety.

她看起来震惊。我把自己描述成一个社交上很自信的人，然后指出她的问题反映了她自己的焦虑。

In a couple of sentences, we reversed social standing. Then she gave me a dreamy look of wanting to get to know me better. Seconds later, we kissed.

在几句话里，我们改变了社会地位。然后她给了我一个梦幻般的眼神，想要更好地了解我。几秒钟后，我们接吻了。

I knew the scenario would play out like this. It always does.

我知道结局会是这样，它总是这样的。

It doesn’t matter if you’re ugly, poor, and stutter. As long as you keep moving forward with a smile and without thinking about what you do or say, then people will gravitate towards you. They can’t help it.

不管你是丑是穷还是口吃。只要你带着微笑继续前进，不去想你做了什么或说了什么，人们就会被你吸引。他们没办法。

It’s the law of attraction.

这就是吸引力定律。

And it starts with action.

它从行动开始。

小编zzz总结

你自信时候真的美多了。

You look so much better when you're confident.

---梁静茹【分手快乐】