Everything I never told you

2014年亚马逊榜首的小说，被我以2英镑的价格从英国带回国内，直到最近闹疫情才拿出来读。

全书的两大线索是种族矛盾和子女的期望矛盾。女主Marilyn在学校和华裔男主相识相知相爱，并最后走入婚姻殿堂生下了带有亚洲人面孔的三个孩子：Nath, Lydia, Hannah. Marilyn 的女权思想使她坚信，女性在学习和职场上都不应该比男性差，并且应该勇敢的追求自己想要的成功，然而在最后一学期完成大学学业的时候却意外怀孕，打破了她对生活的所有幻想。不甘心的她将自己的期待全部投入到长女Lydia身上。 而另一方面，从小受种族压抑的James有一颗敏感的心，觉得周围人待他眼光不同，因此他一直希望女儿Lydia能冲出种族歧视的牢笼，能性格开朗交到更多朋友。 在这样一个家庭中成长，Lydia从小就习惯对母亲说Yes, 并且假装打电话给朋友聊天以博得父亲的开心。后来在哥哥Nath收到哈佛录取通知书可以逃离家庭的时候，又得知自己喜欢的男生Jack其实喜欢的是哥哥Nath时，Lydia彻底崩溃了。终于最后在生日那天，Lydia劝服自己，要改变自己的生活，勇敢对父母的期望说no，并深夜溜出家门，划船到湖面上让自己直面并克服长期以来对水的恐惧，直面自己的过去并打定决心和过去的自己说再见的时候，悲剧发生了。

文章有细致的环境描写和心里描写，例如Hannah发现Jack 对Nath的感情其实是爱： A drop of water trickled out of Nath's hair, like a shy little mouse, and ran down the nape of his neck. It made its slow way between his shoulder blades, and where his back curved, it dropped straight down, as if it had jumped off a cliff, and splashed onto the back of Jack's hand.......And Jack himself jumped. He stared at the drop of water without moving, as if it were a rare insect that might fly away. Then, without looking at any of them, he raised his hand to his mouth and touched his tongue to it, as if it were honey. She recognized it at once: love, one-way deep adoration that bounced off and did not bounce back; careful, quite love that didn't care and went on anyway.

例如Marillyn和James初见迸发出爱情火花时的描写： At that he laughed, and she did, too. she watched tiny crinkles form around the corners of his eyes, and when they unfolded, his face was different, softer, a real person's face now. From here, she saw that his eyes were brown, not black, as they'd seemed in the lecture hall. How skinney he was, she thought, how wide his shoulders were, like a swimmer's, his skin the color of tea, of fall leaves toasted by the sun. She never seen anyone like him.