随着年龄的增长，你意识到了哪些事情?

What are some things you realize as you get older?

From：Joanne Lim

I think this might be more applicable to us women.

我想这可能更适用于我们女性。

Do not confide too much in your friends.

不要向你的朋友倾诉太多。

This was a piece of advice repeated by my mom over and over again as I was growing up. I did not take her seriously, especially when I was a teenager. You see, as a teenager, there weren’t too many things you could tell your mom without triggering a two-hour lecture. If you couldn’t tell your friends stuff, who else could you turn to, right?

在我成长的过程中，这是我母亲一遍又一遍地重复的忠告。我没有把她说的当回事，尤其是在我十几岁的时候。你知道，作为一个十几岁的孩子，不管你告诉妈妈一些什么事情，都会引发一场两个小时的讲座。如果你不能告诉你的朋友，你还能找谁，对吧?

Now that I’m turning 27 in August, the same age my mom was when she had her firstborn, I’ve come to realise there’s a lot of truth in this advice. So last year I began to hang out more with this group of girls. I had this girlfriend who would always complain about her controlling husband (though I suspect there’s more to the story, but not my place to probe). She would complain until it was time for her to go home before her husband started calling non-stop. The second she stepped out of the cafe, a few of us girls would start talking behind her back about what she just told us.

今年8月我就27岁了，和我妈妈生第一个孩子的年龄一样，我开始意识到这个建议蕴含着很多道理。所以去年我开始更多地和这群女孩出去玩。我有一个女朋友，她总是抱怨她的控制欲强的丈夫(尽管我怀疑这个故事还有更多内容，但不是我该探讨的)。她会一直抱怨，直到她该回家的时候，她的丈夫才开始不停地打电话。她一走出咖啡馆，我们几个女孩就开始在她背后议论她刚告诉我们的事情。

I learned quickly gossiping ain’t worth it. Because one time I did not join the girls, and the next time I did I got the impression they’d been talking. Lesson learned.

我很快就知道八卦是不值得的。因为有一次我没有加入女孩们的行列，而第二次我加入的时候，我感觉她们在谈论我。我受到了教训。

And they sure weren’t trying to help me solve any problem. These girls were just collecting gossips. I sure got burned fast.

而且他们也没有试图帮我解决任何问题。这些女孩只是在收集流言蜚语。我很快便引火上身。

Other people do not need to know anything about your life. Even after you confide to them, they still know nothing about your life. Perspectives get shifted in their minds, stories get twisted, and words get put into your mouth.

别人不需要了解你的生活。即使你向他们吐露了心事，他们仍然对你的生活一无所知。他们的想法被改变了，故事被扭曲了，言语被放进了你的嘴里。

You think you’re just venting, but the other girl listening is collecting gossips.

你以为你只是在发泄，但听你说话的那个女孩正在收集流言蜚语。

And don’t waste time gossiping. Because the minute you’re not there, you become the subject of the gossip.

不要把时间浪费在八卦上。因为一旦你不在那里，你就会成为八卦的焦点。

小编zzz总结