2020 我最喜爱的阅读

今年之前我很少做年终阅读总结，要么找不到时间，要么觉得豆瓣给我的“读书报告”里已经有了记录，这就可以了。但随手浏览一遍这些年读过的书单，发现有的当时给的5颗星，现在却不太确定今天是否还是同样的感受，而有几年我自己用Excel 作记录时期的阅读，给的反馈是最清晰的。这便是记录和总结的意义。所以想着，年终的时候回顾一下今年的阅读，给自己留个更主观的记录和反馈，也能更好地期待下一年的阅读。

今年一共读了79本书，这里列了10本作为2020的最爱。有意思的是，当时给5分的作品（比如 Troubled Blood by Robert Galbraith，现在还是会给5分，因为在同类作品里，它给我的阅读享受和过了这么久之后仍然留有的记忆，都感觉值得5分，但是放眼全年的阅读，却不能说它能在最喜爱的作品之列），反而当时有些给了4到4.5的作品，现在回忆起来，沉淀之后它给我的阅读经历和感受更为长久，更为喜爱。(排列不分先后）

Such a Fun Age by Kiely Reid

Such a Fun Age

6.6

Kiley Reid / 2019 / G.P. Putnam's Sons

这是一气呵成的阅读，因为销售结果不错，很多人会以为它是偏向于commercial 的作品而觉得“不够格”。我个人觉得这类主题的书籍(racism, sexism, white savior complex等等），在极具故事趣味性和幽默感的讲述中让人体会，人物本身饱满和多纬度出发，让读者真实感受人本身，和社会问题的多层复杂性，这绝对是佳作。

I don't need you to be mad that it happened. I need you to be mad that it just like... happens.

Homegoing by Yaa Gyasi

Homegoing

8.8

Yaa Gyasi 雅阿·吉亚西 / 2016 / Knopf

恢弘大气又精雕细琢的描写中，作者用不长的篇幅讲述了一家八代人的故事。它易读也紧抓人心，在贴近人物的过程中能让读者更深刻地了解历史。很佩服这位年轻作者的格局和文笔。

We believe the one who has power. He is the one who gets to write the story. So when you study history, you must ask yourself, Whose story am I missing? Whose voice was suppressed so that this voice could come forth? Once you have figured that out, you must find that story too. From there you get a clearer, yet still imperfect, picture.

The Bass Rock by Evie Wyld

The Bass Rock

评价人数不足

Evie Wyld 伊维·怀尔德 / 2020 / Jonathan Cape

今年读了两本Wyld的作品，The Bass Rock是新作，跨越三个时代，从三位女性身上讲述了violence against women 为主题的故事。Wyld的作品最亮眼的地方就是她的节奏--能恰到好处地将故事、人物、疑问、徐徐展开，不给人拖沓之感，也生动深刻地刻画人物。Wyld的作品总能将悬念挥洒地刚刚好，抓住读者心理，想知道“真相”的同时，其实早已深深被人物和故事本身带来的思考留住。

What is he? A wolf or a fox?

The Mothers by Brit Bennett

Bennett是我今年发现的好作者。她广受好评的The Vanishing Half是今年各大榜单最受喜爱作品中最频繁被提到的作品。我个人也很喜欢。但回头看来，她至今只有的两部作品中，第一部 The Mothers 给我留下更深刻的印象。这个情节和节奏都比较平淡的故事，作者着力刻画人物心理，让读者似乎进入到主人公脑海里，体会到人若无法从过去解脱和释怀，人生会是什么样子。没有跌宕起伏的发展，也没有超乎想象的人生遭遇，普通人的故事，普通人的挣扎。

The weight of what has been lost is always heavier than what remains.

Grief was not a line, carrying you infinitely further from loss. You never knew when you would be sling-shot backward into its grip.

Euphoria by Lily King

Euphoria

7.8

Lily King 莉莉·金 / 2014 / Atlantic Monthly Press

今年也一下子读了King的两部作品，她的新作Writers and Lovers 我读完之后并没有感觉被blown away, 但不知道为什么好几个片段到现在也无法忘记。而作者的成名作 Euphoria 让我记住的，不光是整个故事和人物，也有那种被作者带着穿越时光、穿越地点的阅读感受。

I asked her if she believed you could ever truly understand another culture. I told her the longer I stayed, the more asinine the attempt seemed, and that what I’d become more interested in is how we believed we could be objective in any way at all, we who each came in with our own personal definitions of kindness, strength, masculinity, femininity, God, civilisation, right and wrong.

Kindred by Octavia E. Butler

Kindred

8.1

Octavia Butler [美国] 奥克塔维娅·E.巴特勒 / 2009 / Beacon Press

这真的是经典。它和Homegoing一样让我觉得是必读之作。它的优秀，不管是从故事性还是人物刻画，让人没有借口不去了解那段历史。

Better to stay alive," I said. "At least while there's a chance to get free." I thought of the sleeping pills in my bag and wondered just how great a hypocrite I was. It was so easy to advise other people to live with their pain.

Hamnet by Maggie O’Farrell

Hamnet

7.9

Maggie O'Farrell / 2019 / Tinder Press

今年获得Women's Prize for Fiction的作品。主要描写莎士比亚妻子的故事。O'Farrell 的文笔。就这三个理由就值得一读。真的很棒。

What is given may be taken away, at any time. Cruelty and devastation wait for you around corners, inside coffers, behind doors: they can leap out at you at any time, like a thief or brigand. The trick is never to let down your guard. Never think you are safe. Never take for granted that your children's hearts beat, that they sup milk, that they draw breath, that they walk and speak and smile and argue and play. Never for a moment forget they may be gone, snatched from you, in the blink of an eye, borne away from you like thistledown.

All the Birds, Singing by Evie Wyld

All the Birds, Singing

评价人数不足

Wyld, Evie 伊维·怀尔德 / 2013

如果只准备读一本Wyld的作品来试试，想体验我推荐这位作者特别能将悬念完美融合在故事里的优秀，就选这本吧。

I laugh out loud at how wonderful life is that it takes a hell of a knock like that and it’s just fine, and I find the steadiness in myself

Mr. Loverman by Bernardine Evaristo

Mr Loverman

评价人数不足

伯娜丁·埃瓦里斯托 / 2013 / Penguin

我今年读过最喜欢的LGBTQ作品。是属于几年后我会再回首的好书。

I am an individual, specific, not generic.

Girl,Women,Other by Bernardine Evaristo

老实说刚读完整本书我没有给它最高评价，因为它获布克奖，就对其期望尤为高。但随着时间沉淀，我发现自己经常回想这本书的内容。它作为一部焦点在众生相的作品，有它不讨巧的地方，可也是因为这样，更符合作者想告诉我们被边缘化的人们真正在挣扎的地方。作为第一位获得布克奖的黑人女性，她代表的声音很重要。而我们也确实需要更多own voice的作者和作品。

gender is one of the biggest lies of our civilization

Ageing is nothing to be ashamed of Especially when the entire race is in it together Although sometimes it seems that she alone among her friends wants to celebrate getting older Because it’s such a privilege to not die prematurely

women who miraculously spend their working day wearing bondage-tight skirts and vertiginous, destabilizing heels which make their feet look bound the erogenous zones of crushed muscles and cramped bones, encased in upmarket strippers’ heels and if she has to cripple herself to signal her education, talent, intellect, skills and leadership potential then so be it

2020 虽然不是我阅读数量最多的一年，但在这一年的现实情况下，阅读再一次陪我走过了很多个或焦虑或不解的时光，它再一次让我感受阅读这件事本身就是我的anchor，也让我很感恩我有机会去接触和拥有书籍。期待2021。